**WARNING: Explicit language**
Subject: Only Knowledge will set you/us free!
"Going back to the beginning. My love for you was developed when you were born! Greatly intensified by being told she wanted to never let any of us meet or even tell me if you were a girl or boy much less your name that I got from investigating, talking to the hospital were you were born to make sure you were mine so I Wasn't some ass before I took her to court that I did set up but then had no money to pay for and had tried to do ever since but adding back child support, present and court cost it was always way out of my reach even father as time went on that I thought then! Your bonded way more to me than a normal parent and his love for his child but is a good thing as it some times takes a tragic accident to cause in others to make them that close! I'm sorry Penny did just the opposite to you, driving the biggest wedge she ever could insert between us in your mind with lies! You have to get over the lies and know they were, you don't have to hate her for having problems back then as you make it out to what you would do if you let the Real truth in. Plus now you'll look bad for how you been to me and just make up reason after reason to hate me but cause me to say and do everything you don't like, yes you say just the right thing and I will have say just what your going to dislike like saying your mom did it, not I or try to combat what you know is horribly insensitive to me and know I'm just a dad of a kidnapped girl, how else would any man act if his kid was kidnapped or doesn't fathers have feeling? You make men/fathers out to be cold and heartless and said they were to me and now as if you want to hurt their/my very soul so bad I can't handle it. It's one thing your mom doing it but you join in is just nothing I can handle without flipping my lid over! You said one time and I took it as you hated dads, remember the miss birthdays, don't come around much and of course everyone thought you had the worst of them all and you prove that has always bubbled up in you! ALL LIES By Your Loving Mother! Hated Dad Because of her! You make it boil up in me when I believe in God and make it his place to punish if he sees fit and I'm just suppose to forgive and forget! Just as I do but have problems with when I think of all the prejudice blacks I met and seen rape pillage and kill people on. That's why I try not to talk about it because it brings up hatred of the evil they and your mom has done! You force me to go there, talk about her, I NEVER Wanted to but have to because she fills you with lies! But I don't want to hate her or anyone! God takes care of them all! It's not up to us or you to punish me for what I never did or not bond with because of some sick lies and crap you been brought up by! Truth is your my long lost child I been dying to unite with as any parent is with there child much less a kidnapped one, so much more important for me and you, you just don't know anything yet and been ruined to try or trust Daddy! Why do you burden me so? Hurt me so, you draw my attention and then hurt me with never talking and when you did it was always so hurtful and run away so I can't even combat or even comment on it to try to change your messed up way of thinking your mom put in you long ago! Brain washed so bad you care less what you do to me or what happens to me and your brother and the rest here obviously? Only a real caring action by you can prove me wrong, I been right about everything, that is what kills you the most as you try to ruin who I am and what I am and is compared to who you thought was the best parent I proved you had ass backwards your whole life and especially you seem to not take being duped well. God takes care of all, I hope he is easy on you but then you will feel as if what you done was ok if you don't have or feel bad or bad things happen to you because of doing such immoral things to me along with everyone over there is lies to and misguided but never give way to be immoral to anyone for any reason! Not one! Even if the brake one of the ten commandments as you are every day of your life you leave me hurting from you and your moms actions. That is the same as killing someone everyday you know? I guess not? God forgives as I always want to! But you have to ask and then prove it by your actions immediately! Like proving you care! Below is what I started writing earlier but it always go arye and usually just delete it as you never read anything anyway because you can handle the truth in any form because you have went so arye! When are you going to be ready to help your self and me/us! Your family mend?
Love Dad
Taking a peaceful vaca away from Everyone is the best thing u can do before you ever can think clearly?
We never had to have a discussion but when you do & say what you have then we Have to have one! YOU Force me to try to combat all the lies your mom obviously brought you up by. Pitting you against me that you prove has affected you so bad, you Never even Let me defend one thing or change your mind in anyway, that is as bad pitted against a person as anyone ever could be! Worse than cults ruining children against there family's so only they don't matter? Don't you get it, see it? If you never have a discussion so no one who knows the truth and is willing to try to help change your life long mind set, then you prove your pitted/brain washed as you won't Let anyone change your mind, so you feel righteous about mom and now your all being cruel basically? If you went to church like you said you did then God will always bother your conscience about it! You can't get far enough away from it no matter how far you go! Funny, the father you do get away the worse it gets especially if you can't get back here easily! Taking Peaceful vacations away from everyone is the best thing for you usually where there is NO interference by either side, then you know who is good and who you should be spending time with for now. Like the Dad who was done so wrong that even if it was a mistake can never not make anyone to not want to make up for what was done to him and account for the hurt and pain or abandonment you now put on him that is so hurtful, painful and you act like I'm out of line? Only Everyone over there is and you know it and hurt by it especially when I found you was lying to them and then get so caught up in it all you forgot what lie you told who and who you was talking to and I called you on all your lies and then you all look bad so you go back to hiding your head in the dirt. I understand every drop of it and what caused it, mom in a nut shell and her making me out to be nothing to you just as she even told me she was going to do but I refused to believe it and tried my best to make sure your spirit was always alive here but didn't realize how badly ours were not there, well was just ruined us beyond repair especially when you never let us repair it! You said you didn't know if you wanted to have us and THEY Caused so much trouble you didn't want to deal with it, also pitted and guilt tripped you into believing only who you grew up with is suppose to matter and Not Family? If family matters and is important to you then everyone of us should matterjust as much to you and want each one to love you as much as each one over there does! You can Never say were not family when you were held illegally against your other Parents will! That is as far from abandoning you as you can get but just how you treat me as if I did! That Changes Everything that you just don't seem to get?? You also don't get when your lacking so many family members creates such a void of family members you try to replace them with others but you never can say I'm not your Parent/Dad especially after what your mom did to me! Do I have to keep saying that which you hate but cause me to do at every turn, then say I'm trying to pit you against her, it is so nuts, wake up on what your doing and causing and watch what You say if don't like what will no doubt be said back? I think it's what's inside you that causes it, internal sensors look for the truth and whos lying by what you should know will be my reactions after says things to who never did to you what your mom put deep in you, making me hurt and then in turn angers me when anyone is hurt and Have to say something and you have a life of lies making you hate me your whole life and keeps coming out in you that you seem to want to deny, prove me a bad guy and have stretched things to so far fetched as being me it's gotten ridiculous! You know what she did deep down and don't have to look far for proof, just look at how she's been to Madison's dad, that hatred always showed until I came and should know it came down on me as I came in the picture in the height of her hatred for him came out when you were born and even thinking of me as just another Madison dad and child by she was going to have to deal with was totally unacceptable for her at the time! Truth hurts but you don't have to send the messenger to the hospital because you don't like or want to believe it do you? Not much needed to be said really but you let the scare you and get so protective! Just knowing there was a mistake should have changed you totally and been here every day for awhile any way showing us how much of a loving caring person you are and wanting it all mended and forgotten! You instead turned it into a super heightened hurtful thing keeping you on the top of our list of conciseness because of how messed up you are and there were keeping you in the state of! Never even wanting you to talk to us so you won't become attached, remember you saying that but then listened to lies again as they worked on you and never letting me comment! You sat right there and heard your mom change her story of when we meet, all of a sudden she remembered?? We got together after Halloween, she said all of a sudden that is when we quit going out, didn't that sound funny? Didn't the DNA test prove just how much she has lied and manipulated you that you hate to ever think she did/done/doing to you? What she has/is/doing to you Drives me nut when you never ever talked to me really in your life! How fair has that been? How do you let it go on for another minute"
-Jan. 6, 2013 2:47PM
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